Barbara's Angels--Home Page

A poll conducted in April and May of this year found that while the majority of people around the world believe in equal rights for both genders, many don't feel they exist. Most drastic were the statistics from France. Although 99 percent of French men and 100 percent of French women believe in equal rights for both genders, 75 percent of those polled believe French men have a better life than French women. In Western Europe and the United States, nearly everyone believed equal rights based on gender were a necessity. The majority in these countries also believed more changes need to be made to ensure equality. In fact, more people in Western Europe and the United States, commonly thought of as more "developed countries," believed changes still have to be made. Professor Ibarra, who teaches organizational behavior at Insead, the international business school based in Fontainebleau, France attributed this upset to lack of women in leadership. “There are still very few women running large organizations, and business culture remains resolutely a boys’ club.”

When asked if men should be given priority in the job market when jobs are scarce, the majority of those in the Americas and Europe disagreed. However, in countries such as Russia, Poland, Brazil, and Argentina, the population was nearly evenly split on the question. In Victoria Shannon's New York Times article, Equal Rights for Women? Survey Says: Yes, but..., she argues that high ideals do not necessarily translate into reality. She writes, "The poll...shows that in both developing countries and wealthy ones, there is a pronounced gap between a belief in the equality of the sexes and how that translates into reality." The Pew Center, which conducted the survey, seems to agree: “while egalitarian sentiments are pervasive, they are less than robust.”

Several questions appeared to me from reading this article and studying the report: Why do so many people from so many varying countries and varying ways of life agree that equality has not been acheived? In addition, how did the ideology of equal rights become so pervasive in theory, yet so lacking in pracitical implication? Furthermore, should we be ashamed of the gap between theory and reality or proud that egalitarian beliefs have reached so far, even if they are only beliefs?

Weigh in, by emailing BarbarasAngels@gmail.com

May, 2010

GUEST BLOG FROM RACHEL SIMMONS--Why Can’t Women Keep Up with Men? Try the Curse of the Good Girl

Rachel Simmons is an author, educator, and blogger. She has written two New York Times bestsellers: Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls, and The Curse of the Good Girl: Raising Authentic Girls with Courage and Confidence. Rachel is also the founder of The Girls Leadership Institute and serves as a consultant to schools and organizations around the world, working internationally to develop strategies to address bullying and empower girls.

Women, and our struggle for workplace equality, seem to be having a moment. Seems like everywhere you look lately, there’s a story about how we don’t seek or win enough money for tech start-ups; how we still face sexism in the workplace; how there are not enough of us speaking as experts in national media; how we’re too nice to ask for lots of money; and how there are not enough of us willing to “behave like arrogant, self-aggrandizing jerks.”

Hand-wringing ensues. It’s sexism. It’s change that’s slow to come. It’s racism. It’s socialization. And yet one thing is very clear: with the exception of Salon’s Rebecca Traister, almost no one is making more than a passing connection to girls.

I’m feeling pretty crabby about this (welcome to my first ever rant!). I’m all for these articles, and I’m grateful that some of the writers quoted me.

Yet despite a growing mountain of evidence that women are still slipping in our high heels, the party line on girls is that they’re doing just fine in their soccer cleats. It’s boys – riddled with attention problems, new body image woes and learning crises — who need rescuing.

Let’s be clear. I’m not into to suffering contests, or zero sum games. Boys need help, too. But I can’t stand the argument that girls are flying high, powered by Title IX, mothers who boycotted Barbie and Girl Scout cookie sales. Because it’s just not true.

To be fair, girls do look great on paper. They graduate from high school in higher numbers, get better grades, and hold more leadership positions than boys. Look more closely at what the data doesn’t measure, and the picture gets complicated: too many girls lack an inner resume: the skills and permission to assert their opinions, promote their own talents and take healthy risks that might result in failure.

Many girls aspire to a version of selfhood that puts a psychological glass ceiling on their potential to succeed. They suffer from what I call the Curse of the Good Girl: the pressure to be liked by everyone, generous to a fault and flawless at everything you do. Good Girls are taught to be modest and teeth gnashingly friendly. They are not so good at self-advocacy, saying no, putting themselves out there and dealing with constructive criticism.

Why aren’t we looking at girlhood? Could it be that people see American girls as people whose primary preoccupations – when they’re not pulling their straight A’s — are Facebook, the latest sale, and the newest episode of Glee? The Curse of the Good Girl is putting down roots in girls’ souls from the earliest ages. It’s putting a cap on their career potential long before they have their first job interviews.

Too many girls begin speaking in class with the ritualized phrase, “I’m not sure if this is right, but….” They make their sentences sound like questions to sand the edges off their convictions. Ask a teenage girl to name her strengths in front of her peers, and you’re likely to get silence, nervous laughter or a barely audible response. Then there’s mistakes and failure. Girls aspiring to be Good don’t do so well when they screw up. They personalize criticism, believing it means people don’t like them anymore.

These are the girls who graduate from college and don’t negotiate raises, flag down the same venture capital, own their strengths in job interviews and take the risks that result in business success. To be sure, the Curse of the Good Girl isn’t the only reason why women are slipping. There’s institutional sexism, racism and homophobia. Oh, and that small detail about women in heterosexual partnerships doing most of the housework and childcare, not to mention the villainy women suffer when they put work on par with family (explored brilliantly here by Kate Harding).

Around middle school, girls are known to lose gobs of self-esteem. It’s a reverse butterfly process where the fearlessness of girlhood is consumed wholesale by the ruthless self-consciousness of adolescence. This metamorphosis was made famous by Mary Pipher’s Reviving Ophelia, and Carol Gilligan and Lyn Mikel Brown’s Meeting at the Crossroads. To look at the phenomenon of women struggling at work would be to think some second epic change strikes young women down between the blinding success of high school and their first jobs.

No such luck. What’s happening here has been in the works for years. And until we spend time working with girls on developing the real world muscles they need to succeed on par with men, we’ll be writing a whole lot of articles.

This post is also available at Rachel's blog

April, 2010

Groundbreakers: Female Writers in the Middle Ages

About a year ago (holy crap! It's been that long?!), I posted my 7th grade term paper on Minoan women and the matriarchal society they created. Recently, when doing some spring cleaning, I came across my 8th grade term paper on the inspiring and ground-breaking female writers of the Middle Ages. After an hour or so of struggling with converting the scanned copy of my term paper into a word document, I managed to work it out! Take a look:

"Our New City": How Medieval Women Revealed Desires for Freedom Through Writing (May, 2008)

Christine De Pizan & Queen Isabella

European life during the 12th through, 15th century focused mainly on men. However, the restrictions on women's power during the Middle Ages did not prevent them from writing important and inspiring stories and books. Through writing, reading, and bearing stories, women experienced freedoms that their restrictive society otherwise banned them from. The use of humor, bawdiness, and exaggerated trickery gave women writers and readers an outlet to express and experience their desires.

Men held the most important jobs, did the most important tasks, and made the most important decisions. Society allowed women small tasks and less important jobs than men. A woman's entire life depended on whom, when, and if she married. Women could usually only achieve status through marriage, which varied depending on age, background, and whether or not they were a virgin. For a man, marriage was a way to add to his property and wealth, and no man was dependent on it. When married, the man took a portion of the land and wealth which came from the woman's family. This made it extremely difficult for the woman to ever leave the man or function on her own. In the manor, the man was in charge of any major decision, even though he was not always there. This meant that though his wife may know more about the happenings in the household, when it came to arranging trade or deals with other manors, the husband was in charge.

Society viewed women as not having as important a role as men, even though their presence kept society going. Despite the small jobs they had, women were crucial to the existence of Medieval society. For example, although Lords made the most decisions about the manor which they governed, their wives were constantly busy hiring and firing workers, arranging all the needs of the children, and supervising the performing of many tasks equivalent to those performed in a small town. A woman could also attain several occupations outside the home, although many did not receive credit for the work they did. The attitude toward female healers and physicians provide a perfect example of this disrespect. Female physicians saved many lives, by educating the rest of the world about female illnesses. These women were not just midwives and women's illness specialists; they treated men in addition to women. Since the law didn't grant any woman a medical license, all treatments performed by women, the law considered malpractices. Even after a woman's death, her descendents didn’t honored her as they would a man.

Options for women in the 12th through 15th century were extremely slim, and writing became one of the few ways women could be taken seriously. In addition to achieving respect through their writing, women began to write stories that reflected their frustrations, doubts, and wishes about the society around them. Soon, the promise of freedom, self-sufficiency, and power echoed from woman to woman in the form of writing and stories.

A major genre of women's writing during the 12th century consisted of short stories which depicted women as conniving and clever. Though the female characters in these stories are often lying, deceitful, and rather detestable, they are ultimately very powerful, strong women, who are simply fighting against the unfair ways society treats them. Marie De France's lais, poetic short tales meant to be sung or said, as well as her other short stories, feature female tricksters. Most of the stories include a recurring character: the male victim. He is usually dim-witted, gullible, and sometimes, as many young women's husbands would be, elderly.

The trickery of the wives is sometimes so far-fetched, one wonders how the husband falls for it. In one story, a husband finds his wife in bed with another man. Angered, he begins to yell at her. The wife tells the husband that things are not always what they seem, and brings him over to a barrel of water. She asks him what he sees, and he says he sees himself. The wife then reasons that since the husband, himself, is not actually in the barrel of water, things are not always what they seem. The husband apologizes for thinking his wife was having an affair. The woman in this story tricks her husband, which was probably thought of as evil by the readers, but may have been an expression of frustration from the author, and interpreted as thus by some female readers. In another of Marie De France's stories, a noblewoman unknowingly marries a werewolf. When her husband tells her be is a werewolf, she leaves him and turns him into a werewolf forever. She then marries her lover. In the end of the story, the king finds out what the woman has done, and banishes her from the kingdom. Although the woman in this story is the antagonist, who is punished for her bad deed, she is also the most important character. She causes all the action in the story, by being powerful and cunning. Without her, the story would be nothing. Perhaps the appeal of this story to women was reading about a woman having so much power.

The evil and outrageous ways the women in these stories act are unusual and would be considered shocking if women had acted this way in rea1life. However, the mere thought of women acting this way allowed authors and readers to expressed hidden wishes or desires, and female readers to feel a short escape.

Christine De Pizan, by far the most respected female writer of the 15th century, set an example, both with her books and lifestyle, that women could be self-sufficient. She wrote over twenty published pieces. De Pizan's The City of Ladies describes a utopia for women. Three queens, called Reason, Right Thinking, and Justice build the city, and women run all aspects of the society. In this book, De Pizan also discusses why men hate women, suggesting it is because of jealousy. This idea was shocking for a time when most people considered women inferior to men at all things. De Pizan believed in the power and potential of women, possibly because of her experiences living without a man to support her.

Christine De Pizan's own life was an example of female self-sufficiency. De Pizan became a widowed at an early age and supported herself and her three children entirely by writing and selling books. She commissioned female artists to illustrate her books. In her autobiography, Vision of Christine, she explores the notion that her husband's death served a purpose in both teaching her to be self-sufficient, and in freeing her from the many household duties wives had. This statement shows that De Pizan viewed marriage partially as a trap standing in the way of women's independence.
During the 12th through 15th centuries, the main hardship keeping women from achieving equal status with men was their dependency on men. Typically, a woman had to be married to succeed. Even if she was not married, or if she had a job, she was still dependent on men: employers, customers, and government officials. For women with seemingly no way to lead a totally self-sufficient life successfully, Christine De Pizan broke countless barriers. Her work emphasized a woman's ability to live alone, and her lifestyle not only depended entirely on women and herself, but was successful. Both men and women revered De Pizan, and she led a new kind of life for a woman at that time.

Another popular genre of writing, which many women writers explored during the Middle Ages, was erotic humor, which made use of puns and crude jokes. Through humor, these stories explored freedoms that weren't otherwise open to women at that time. In almost every such story, a married woman has an affair with a man, tricking her husband.

The humorous way in which writers told these stories allowed the female characters to behave scandalously for the time, and the stories still to be read. The sexual freedom women experience in these novels is far beyond what they would experience in everyday life. In some stories women have three or four lovers, and trick all of them at once. In one story, a woman rolls onto her husband's dinner table with her lover, and he doesn't even notice. For women during the Middle Ages, these books provided an escape from the male-dependent life they led.

There are critics who believe that the immoral, evil roles women play in female literature from the Middle Ages represented the way society treated women in everyday life, and encouraged men and the rest of society to continue hating women. Other critics claim that in stories of naive old men and young wives with lovers, the old men know about all the happenings in their house, and are mocking the women by pretending to believe them. Christine De Pizan starts off Vision of Christine by saying, "Oh dear God, I wish I had been born a man. Many people view this comment as proof that De Pizan's writings were not pro·woman, but woman pitying. Lastly, one could make the point that tales of erotic humor depicted women's most important purpose as sexually pleasing men.

However, the negative roles women played in female literature actually empowered women. By showing women that they could outsmart men, women saw that they were not inferior to men. Marie De France ends one of her stories by saying, "Intellect and trickery are more worthy and more helpful than goods or heritage,” showing her true beliefs on women's intelligence and potential value in society. When Christine De Pizan said, "Oh dear God, I wish I had been born a man" she was far from pitying women. She went on to say, "Alas good Lord, why have you not made me born into this world a man so that I should not have erred in anything and might be as greatly perfect as men say they are." Christine De Pizan acknowledges the hardships women have to face and how they can overcome them. More interestingly, however, she seems to mock the high self-esteem she thinks men have. Lastly, in the stories of erotic humor, women are not the objects of sexual pleasure. It is quite the opposite. In a typical story of this type, a woman may be found sleeping with two or even three different men, for her own sexual pleasure. The way the female characters use the male characters is similar to the way men thought women should be used in everyday life. To men, these stories offered a hilarious alternative, but to women they were a manifestation of not only their desires, but their anger.

Women of the Middle Ages lived in a society that didn't value them, and took what they had to offer for granted. Men thought of women as wives and mothers, but not as equal individuals. In this time of great inequality, female writers discovered ways to voice their feelings and express their desires without losing respect. Through their stories and books, they called out to women throughout Europe, who were facing the same oppression they were, and these women heard their voices. Christine De Pizan declares in The City of Ladies, "All women who have loved and do love and will love virtue and morality, rejoice and exult in our New City which, thanks to God, is already formed and almost finished and populated."

March, 2010

The 2010 Vital Voices Global Leadership Awards

Last week I had the opportunity to attend Vital Voices' 2010 Global Leadership Awards Gala in Washington DC. Vital Voices is an amazing organization dedicated to helping women leaders around the world. I first heard about the organization when I heard Vital Voices President and co-founder Alyse Nelson speak at a program I did last summer. Nelson was an Hillary Clinton at the 1995 Beijing Conference on Women amazing speaker, who told us about her visit as a young woman to the 1995 Conference on Women in Beijing, where then first lady Hillary Clinton delivered the famous words: "Human rights are women's rights and women's rights are human rights." It was Clinton's words and the stories of women Nelson met from all over the world at that conference that planted the seeds for Vital Voices.

As Vital Voices puts it, their mission is "to identify, invest in and bring visibility to extraordinary women around the world by unleashing their leadership potential to transform lives and accelerate peace and prosperity in their communities." The organization seeks out women from many different backgrounds, training and mentoring them in ways they can help their communities. Secretary Hillary Clinton is a Chair along with Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison, bringing a level of legitimacy to the organization that has led it to be internationally respected and provide protection to the women it helps.

Every year, Vital Voices puts together an incredible awards ceremony, where they honor women with extraordinary leadership abilities from all over the world. I had heard amazing things about the awards ceremony from a friend who attended last year, but it proved to be even more moving than I expected. Celebrities and well known icons such as Reese Witherspoon, Brian Williams, Nicholas Kristof, Diane von Furstenberg, Sally Field, Suze Orman, Hillary Clinton, and Kay Bailey Hutchison gave short speeches on the importance of the organization and presented awards to the women. It was great to see the women being honored--some of whom I had never heard of--be welcomed onto the stage by such important figures in American media and politics.

The women receiving awards varied in age, background, and field of leadership, but all were inspiring. The women honored were Panmela Castro of Brazil, Afnan Al Zayani of Bahrain, Andeisha Farid of Afghanistan, Rebecca Lolosoli of Kenya, Roshaneh Zafar of Pakistan, and Melinda French Gates.

I was especially moved by Rebecca Lolosoli of Kenya, who perfectly exemplifies a woman who does what is hardest in order to do what is right. A member of the Samburu tribe in Kenya, Lolosoli witnessed cultural Samburu practices which were harmful and violent to women, such as the treatment of women who had endured rape, forced marriage, female genital cutting, as well as females who had been widowed or orphaned. When she spoke out on behalf of these women, Lolosoli was brutally beaten. Ready to start anew, Lolosoli and sixteen other women seeking shelter started their own community in 1990 called the Umoja Uaso Women’s Organization (Umoja means "unity"). Lolosoli and the other women of Umoja remain self-sufficient by selling their homemade jewelry. Diane Von Furstenberg recently collaborated with Lolosoli to showcase the jewelry in Von Furstenberg's 2010 spring collection.

Lolosoli, herself, spoke on the stage during the Vital Voices 2010 Global Leadership Awards, and blew me away. She was dressed in traditional African garb, with intricate beading work nearly from head to toe...except for her feet on which she wore white tennis shoes. It was very indearing to see her speak because she is clearly still somewhat unfamiliar with American culture, but doesn't allow that to halt her confidence. Despite her somewhat Lolosoli's beads were featured in DVF's spring collection broken English, Lolosi delivered a message of hope and inspiration. She spoke not just as a victim, but rather as an advocate and an innovator who was able to draw strongly from her own experiences. At the end of her speech, she embraced Diana Von Furstenberg, who introduced her and has had the pleasure of working with her, and left the stage to tremendous applause.

All in all, the night was a spectacular event. By the time all the women stepped onstage again to a choir singing James Taylor's "Bridge Over Troubled Water," I felt like I was witnessing one of history's great moments. I watched as Hillary Clinton, Diane Von Furstenberg, Rebecca Lolosoli and others joined hands on stage, and felt a wave of warmth fill my chest. It sounds corny, but it moved me so much!

You can check out photos of the event here.

February, 2010

Pop Culture Icons Dirty Up Their Act: Ke$ha and Gaga Man Up

Lady Gaga Kesha Rose Sebert wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy. Then the young, blonde, singer-songwriter brushes her teeth with a bottle of Jack and hits the city. I’m paraphrasing Sebert, better known as “Ke$ha” in her popular song “Tik Tok,” which is about partying, getting drunk, and being the center of attention. These themes may not seem unusual to most people. After all, our culture puts a lot of emphasis on sex, money, drugs, and alcohol. But, something about the comparison between Ke$ha and P. Diddy seems a little off. Could it be that, although she’s reiterating themes we hear all the time, Ke$ha is actually one in a group of fresh, young, female, pop music mavericks? The past year has brought forward a few women who are stepping all over the good girl image, while simultaneously embracing a bad girl image many of us have never seen before. We’re used to seeing girls partying and dancing in music videos, but it’s always behind male rappers who brag about sex and money, while often degrading women. Can girls be “lookin’ like pimps”? Can they have “swagger”? Ask Lady Gaga and Ke$ha, who are proving to be some of 2010’s most interesting women as they dirtying up their acts, with alcohol, dollar signs, sex….and maybe messages of empowerment.

Although Lady Gaga only graduated recently from New York’s all girls, east side, private, high school The Convent of Sacred Heart, she has sparked enough controversy to last a lifetime. From her wild outfits, to her performance for the Queen of England, to rumors that she is a hermaphrodite, Gaga is constantly the center of attention, and she does nothing to stop it. In many of her interviews and shows, Gaga makes purposefully provocative statements, such as saying her “vagina was very offended” in response to hermaphrodite rumors. Later, in one of her concerts, Gaga responded to the question of whether or not she had male genitalia with the answer, “Yes I do, and it’s much bigger than yours.”

Ke$ha
Pop culture moves quickly, but I’m sure you all haven’t forgotten Ingrid Michaelson, Corinne Bailey Rae, and Colbie Cailliat. Or maybe you have, because their breathy little girl voices, and sugary songs don’t even seem to be from the same decade as tunes like “Tik Tok” and “Disco Stick” by Ke$ha and Lady Gaga. Caillat’s hit was called “Bubbly” for god’s sake. Don’t get me wrong, I listen to all three artists and even like their music, but I’m pretty sure none of them are “lookin’ like pimps”. Then there’s their appearances. I hardly remember what Caillat, Michaelson, and Rae look like, aside from a general style of soft summer dresses and occasional librarian glasses. Now think about Gaga and Ke$ha who’s appearances are almost as important as their songs. Both frequently parade around in costume-like clothing, and sport ridiculous, even unflattering makeup, creating a unique and really weird spectacle.

I think it’s clear there’s a change happening in popular culture. Megan Fox dominated the scene recently with provocative statements about her sexuality and her no nonsense attitude. Runway shows have started showcasing militaristic looks for women, rather than the babydoll dresses and flats that were popular a few years ago. Are witnessing the toughening up of women? And if so, is it going too far? In Lilly Jay’s recent blog entry for Rachel Simmons, Why Lady Gaga is a Role Model for Girls, she writes, “While I’m not a fan of some of her hypersexual lyrics…there are (at least) five good reasons to consider the lady a good role model for girls. She isn’t afraid to act smart, dress for herself, focus on things other than her body, be odd, and have a sick name.” It’s true: Ke$ha, Gaga, Fox, and others may be going a little overboard with the sex, partying, and attention, but, personally, I think it’s about time the girls dancing in bikinis behind rappers stepped out, grabbed the mike, and owned their own swagger.

Check out the comments on this blog

January, 2010

New Year's Resolution: In With The Old, Out With The New

With the New Year approaching, I can’t help but entertain the idea of resolutions. As I think back on past years and try to recall goals I set for myself, I can’t think of any. I certainly can’t think of any I’ve actually achieved. However, I can think of many things both in my personal and more public life that I feel I’ve conquered since December, 2008. This makes me wonder if the idea of New Year’s Resolutions is actually incredibly contrived, artificial, and unrealistic.

In the past, I always said I couldn't think of something good to resolve to do. Everything was either too trivial to be worth calling a “resolution” or too difficult a goal to ever expect to reach. The truth is, resolution ideas are plastered all around us. Sometimes, they’re spelled out clearly like this page of beauty resolutions in Cosmopolitan, and sometimes they’re less obvious. While shopping online for New Year’s Eve outfits, I came across tons of advertisements of skinny models laughing and flaunting their flawless makeup and perfectly blown out hair. In a way, these ads are resolution suggestions in themselves. It’s almost like all the insecurities we hold about ourselves are allowed to come out on New Years, when we swear to fix all of them at once. On the days leading up to New Year’s, we indulge in all sorts of pleasures, like holiday sweets, extra socializing, and stumbling home incredibly late on New Year’s Eve. Then, we’re supposed to feel okay about it all because supposedly we begin a strict regime of acting, eating, and feeling right the next day? Maybe we should be making resolutions to accept ourselves as we are, rather than seeking around for what we can change, tweak, and perfect about our bodies, minds, and souls. On the other hand, maybe a chance for self-examination is a good thing.

Yesterday, I watched Julie & Julia, the Norah Ephron movie about Julia Child and a young woman who cooked her way through Child’s entire cookbook in one year, while blogging about it. Throughout the movie, Julie Powell, played by Amy Adams, says she feels like Julia Child is almost in the kitchen with her, and that she is forming a connection with the older chef. When Julie and her husband get into a fight, she writes a blog entry about how she feels badly about herself, and how she wants to be more like Julia, who would never have let things get out of hand, like she did.

Something about this moment really struck me. I related to the way Julie spoke about this older woman who had inspired her. In the course of my many papers and schoolwork over the years, I often find myself intrigued by a woman I stumble across in history or literature. Similar to Julie, I’ve felt a connection to these women, whether they be Russian Revolutionaries like Alexandra Kollontai or Medieval feminist writers like Christine De Pizan. Sometimes it’s a quote that first grabs me, or a portrait of them standing alone amongst five men. Whatever the case, I become personally invested in their stories of strength and fortitude, and find myself—often sidetracked—researching them further.

You’re probably wondering why I’m talking about all this in a New Year’s Resolution post. Well, that scene in Julie & Julia struck me for another reason. Here was a young woman who was not just inspired and awe-struck by a historical heroine, she was beating herself up about how she had be imperfect, something she claimed Child never would have done. In the rest of the movie, however, we see that that’s not the case. We see that Child was a human being just like Powell, and that she too made mistakes from time to time. So, Julie’s resolution was a little impractical too. However, there is some merit in trying to learn from women who came before us, so long as we keep in mind that they weren’t perfect either.

This year I might try something new. I’m thinking of channeling some of these great women I’ve encountered through the years whenever I find myself in a difficult situation. Yeah, it might be strange to think, What would Senator Jeanette Rankin do? when trying to decide which classes to sign up for, but I want to let their stories guide me. I want to remember what they went through, and I want to try and feel that connection, not just when I’m reading their Wikipedia’s, but when it really matters. The next time I have to speak in front of a crowd, stand up for something I believe in, or give credit to a peer, I’m going to try to remember these women. I guess you could say, I’m resolving not to forget…because, despite the new year, sometimes it’s most important to look back.

December, 2009

A Letter To My Former Self

When I attended the Girls Leadership Institute I was going into my freshman year. For most people, this is a pretty transitional time. Most incoming freshmen are attending a new school, or at least a new division of their school. My school was different. High school started in 7th grade, and so I was pretty sure I knew everything I needed to. I think I thought of myself as a pretty confident person. How I measured this confidence, I’m not sure, but I think it had something to do with standards I compared myself with. Did I think I was pretty? Yeah, I was basically satisfied with my appearance. Did I think I was smart? I had good grades and I went to a good school. Did I feel comfortable meeting new people? Hey, I was at GLI, and I’d just made a ton of friends, so yeah, obviously! In a way, I wish I could back to my fourteen-year-old self, and sort of do a reality check. I think I would have sat myself down and asked myself different questions.

You might be wondering what’s causing me to examine my former self. Well, the other day I came across a pretty interesting letter. It was from me, Fiona Lowenstein. I realized it was the letter I wrote while at GLI all about my goals for the future, and the person I thought I was currently. It was mailed to me six months after I wrote it, but I don’t really think it made as much of an impact then. Only now, in my sophomore year do I really get it.

I remember when we were told to write the letters. I remember sitting there and thinking, What do I want to change about myself? What am I unhappy with? It had been really hard for me to self-examine for the first week. It was only after a while that I realized there was one thing I wasn’t completely happy about in my life, and that was my music. Ever since I can remember, I’ve been writing songs. I say that because my parents tell me I used to just sing as I made my way throughout the house. Apparently, I would create entire musicals in my room. As I grew older, it developed, and so by the summer before freshman year, I was singing and playing songs I’d written on the piano, and I had a bunch of them. There was only one problem: I was only playing them for myself.

Okay, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. I played them for my parents, and their friends sometimes, when they asked me to, but I was not comfortable performing in front of my friends. This seems sort of weird to me in a way, looking back on it, because I never felt afraid to be who I really was, or like I lived a double life in any other way….but, I really was. I would come home from school and sit at the piano and write two songs in one afternoon, and then I wouldn’t tell anyone aside from my parents about it. The worst part is, it didn’t bother me that much. I was happy and secure in nearly every other part of my life, so why would dwell on this?

Looking back on it, I’m realizing that it went deeper than the songs. It was not just a strange shyness about playing my music…it was an attempt to fit in. In middle school, and even high school, I think we’re all trying to figure out who we really are. Are we the prude? The slut? The smart girl? The class clown? The list goes on, but the fact is, it’s almost impossible to be more than one. The problem with that is…we’re all more than one! We’re all prudes, sluts, geeks, and every other label imaginable, it’s only that not everyone gets to see those sides of us.

Reputation is such a loaded word when you’re fourteen. You need to have a good reputation, whatever that means. I think I worked hard to create a balance so that people would think of me a certain way. The funny part is, I can’t remember what I wanted them to think of me as, only what I didn’t want them to think of me as. I was definitely happy, though. I managed to secure a positive reputation early on, so why would I change that? Why would I risk losing being thought of as the smart girl who goes for what she wants? Yeah, that may not have been my first choice label, but, labels are like playing roulette. You could make the most harmless movement, and lose everything.

I didn’t realize any of this back then, of course, so that’s what’s so interesting about my letter. It doesn’t say any of this. It mostly mentions people I’m not even friends with anymore. There’s just one little line that says, I want to be able to play my songs for my friends. It doesn’t say, I want to feel comfortable reading my poetry out loud. It doesn’t say I want to feel comfortable blogging. It doesn’t say I want to risk it all to be who I really am. But all these things are there, if you only read between the lines.

A lot has changed since then. I gradually began playing music for groups other than the people I went to school with. I made friends at school who hadn’t known me in 8th grade. I was able to reinvent myself, until I had fully introduced another part of who I am. It was a truly amazing feeling.

In the past few months, I’ve opened myself up even more. I can credit the internet with this. I’ve blogged for The Huffington Post, this website, and my own site. Not only does this mean sending out my message to the world, it means I can receive comments on whatever I say. This is a scary thought, when you think about it, because there are some rude people out there, but I guess it’s all part of introducing myself. Not everyone’s gonnna like you, right?

Lastly, I set up a youtube channel for my music. At first, it was fine. I mean, it’s almost easier with strangers, sort of like performing for a large audience as opposed to a small group…you can’t see anyone’s face. Then, people I know started watching. It started out with my close group of friends, but the day after I posted one video, I had people I’d never spoken to before come up to me in school and talk to me about it. Everyone seemed to know…and it was okay.

So far, I haven’t gotten any rude comments on any of the content I post on the web. I received a couple emails about my website which called it “too liberal” and a few anti-abortion emails, which didn’t bother me, because I don’t even mention abortion on the site. They were sort of out of left field. Now I look forward to the comments; I love hearing the feedback, even if it’s constructive criticism. I can’t imagine what my 8th grade self would have said about that!

The fact is, it doesn’t really matter. I guess my only regret is that instead of finding my letter from 8th grade in 10th grade, I could have found a letter from 10th grade in 8th. I’m guessing it would have gone a little something like this:

Dear Fiona,
Take the gamble; be yourself.
PS—always read between the lines :)

November, 2009

Stressing the Double Standard

He’s a stud, she’s a slut. He’s funny, she’s freaky. He has fun, she’s wild. He’s so chill, she’s a screw up.

We’re all familiar with the double standards that create stereotypes divided on gender lines in high school…they’ve existed for as long as anyone can remember. However, there is a new typecast I’ve noticed especially among my generation, which I think is important to explore. That’s the geek versus the hard worker, the lazy versus the flunking. Why do girls feel more pressure to do well in school?

In the past few years, there has been a trend of girls excelling at their schoolwork more than their male peers. More girls are going to college, and as a whole girls are making better grades than boys. At the same time, I have noticed that it is becoming less and less socially acceptable for girls to do badly in school and boys to do well. Of course there are exceptions, and standards vary based on the school and the area, but it seems more and more that expectations girls will do their work are higher than those placed on boys. Most of the girls I know, regardless of their “social status” or “popularity” stress out about school and their grades. This is not considered weird by any standard and it is often viewed as not normal when a girl expresses that she doesn’t care. On the other side of the spectrum, I’ve noticed that when boys strive to be the best they can it is sometimes viewed as “dorky” or “un-cool.” It is certainly more acceptable for a guy to say “f**k it” about homework than a girl.

Maybe it’s just the outward appearance, and girls and boys are working equally as hard, but then I feel we must examine why the extra pressure from peers to do well is present in the lives of most high school girls, and not as many high school boys. Even I succumb to it: I would be reluctant to be friends with a girl who didn’t do her work, but with a boy it seems more commonplace.

The media doesn’t do anything but encourage this idea. There are so many commercials where the smart wife is taking care of her dopey husband, even if that just means buying the laundry detergent he can use more easily. In shows like Degrassi and Freaks and Geeks, we see girls tutor boys in school, or in the case of Mean Girls, pretend to be stupider than they are so the boys will tutor them. The message here being that girls are smarter and will do better in school, unless they pretend otherwise. On the one hand, it’s great to see girls portrayed as intelligent, hard workers instead of brainless bimbos—but while we’re on the topic of bimbos, why is that word both so negative and so uniquely used to describe girls? Could it be that male bimbos are looked upon more favorably than female ones? For anyone who's ever seen You, Me, and Dupree--that movie makes it very clear that male bimbos can be cool, funny, and lovable.

Rachel Simmons has written about the “good girl” and the conflicting messages girls are sent from family, friends, and society around them. Girls are told to be smart, but at the same time not to be too bossy or too much of a show-off. Rachel looks at how many different identities girls are told to have. In the long run, I think all this extreme “Who am I?” conflict within us causes us to be less relaxed in areas like schoolwork. We’re supposed to be perfect in most other ways, so why would school be any different?

I am no stranger to stress, and I’ve learned to try and distance the feelings inside my head from the reality on the notebook in front of me. I’ve had countless conversations with other girls about how overwhelmed I’ve felt and how to minimize the worry and anxiety. I have never been able to communicate this with any of my male peers. Maybe boys are taught to be less open with their feelings about stress, but I think it goes deeper than that. The mother of a close family friend, a boy I had gone to school with since the age of five, often relays to my own mother that she feels her son is fairly relaxed and doesn’t feel concern or nervousness about completing his work. Hearing these things always made me incredulous and confused, until I looked at it from a broader point of view.

Failing at something is not the worst thing that can happen. Not trying it is. This motto is not widespread among my female peers, however. Fear of failure manifests itself in many different ways for girls. In avoiding conflict, in not asking for things, in romantic relationships, and finally in school, where the worst thing a girl can be given is a big, fat F.

I am certainly not encouraging slacking off on work, but I do think it is important that we, girls face our fear of failure, because it is all that is holding us back. I hope that more girls can come to terms with their abilities and separate themselves from what is essentially more pressure to be perfect. It’s time for “Real Girls” not “Good Girls.”

You can read this same post on Woosh!

October, 2009

Ruth Gruber: Inside of Time

Watch the trailer here. (just skip the preview)

September, 2009

Reading Madelein Albright's Pins

For as long as they have existed, women in power have struggled with their outward appearance. The media is always picking their outfits apart, and we contsnatly hear stories of women in politics being judged based on their appearance. I wrote about this phenomenon in February, with my post The Nail Polish Club, but a recent visit to the Museum of Arts and Designs has made me reconsider my view on the constant question of femininity many women in power face. I say this after visiting an exhibition of Former Secretary of State Madeline Albright's pin collection which demostrates that is, in fact, possible to present a feminine side and still be taken seriously. Albright acheived even more than that, as she used her pins to help her state her point. Madelein Albright

Albright's recently published book, Read My Pins: Stories From A Diplomat's Jewelry Box, relays the stories of her career through the pins she wore. Known for her strenth and influence, Albright was respected and even feared by diplomats and leaders from all over the world. Her many encounters with international figures meant that her presentation was extremely important. This is where the pins come in.

They differ in size and color, displayed in large glass cases, filling the entire room. Albright must have had hundreds of pins, and the variation is amazing. Each pin is more than a decorative piece of jewelry, however; most have a story of bravery or compassion that goes along with them. One pin that caught my eye was a coiled serpant. Upon further inquiry, I found out that Albright wore this pin when discussing Iraq after an Iraqi poet-in-residence called her an "unparalleled serpant."

Another pin has several tiny missles. When Albright was meeting with Russian leaders, she recieved several comments on the choice of jewelry. Albright replied, "We can make them very small, so you should be ready to negotiate."

Some of my favorite pins included one that shows glass being shattered, representing the breaking of the glass ceiling, one that contains an actual piece of the Berlin Wall, and one that shows Atlas--she feels the Secretary of State carries the Weight of the World on his or her shoulders. Some of the symbolism is more obvious such as a polar bear for climate change or a World War II allies pin.

What is so wonderful about the exhibit is not the pins themselves or even the stories behind them, but the way Albright used these feminine accessories to display such messages of courage, intellect, and power. It brings a whole new element to the gender struggle so many women in power face: appearing too tough, or appearing too weak. Albright has done more than strike the perfect balance: she has defied the stereotype by embracing it. Once again, Madeline Albright is taking a stand for something we all can rally behind.

Learn more about Madeline Albright.

August, 2009

Blogging on the Huffington Post

This summer I had the unique opportunity to blog on the Huffington Post about my experience being in the book, She's Out There! I'm posting my blog below as well.

At 12 years old, I began my essay for She's Out There! with the sentence, "I sincerely hope I am not the first woman president." My aspiration to join a long line of female presidents hardly seemed dramatic then. Hillary Clinton had just announced her candidacy, and Nancy Pelosi had become Speaker of the House. Looking back, my optimism seems a bit naïve. Don't get me wrong, I still believe in a long line of female presidents, but I now have even more respect for the women who have paved the way thus far. After following Hillary Clinton's heroic battle in particular, I have realized how strong women must be to run for office.

My interest in politics was first sparked by the 2000 election. I decided, at age six, that I wanted to be a news reporter, and throughout elementary school I attempted to start newspapers. My classmates were receptive to my ideas -- or maybe they just thought the newspapers were fun. Either way, I don't remember feeling alone in my passion.

When I was 11, I participated in a mock-Congress which passed a hypothetical bill. That's when I decided I wanted to run for office. The next year, I wrote my first term paper -- about the history of women in politics. I contacted women in the House and Senate and was able to interview several, as well as Geraldine Ferraro. I titled my paper after a Nancy Pelosi quote, "Breaking the Marble Ceiling." Through my research I also secured an internship with Congresswoman Carolyn Maloney. Despite the fact that I was only 12, her staff welcomed me, treating me like any other intern and providing one of the best experiences of my life. Congresswoman Maloney remains an inspirational role model for me.

I became increasingly interested in the deficiency of women in leadership roles and looked to share these shocking statistics with my peers. But there seemed to be a deficiency of teenage girls interested in politics, as well. This worried me. Who was going to change the leadership gap if not my generation? I was frequently asked, "Why are you so interested in politics?" To me, politics was not a hobby, like knitting or soccer; it was the world around me...how could I not be interested? Another surprise was how few girls and women identify themselves as feminists. Many of my friends treat it as a dirty word, or as a movement with no relation to them.

Growing up, I was lucky to have the guidance and friendship of Barbara Seaman, a women's health rights advocate. Barbara gave me books, introduced me to inspiring women, and taught me to think for myself about feminism, politics, and the world around me. After her death in February 2008, I remembered her faith in the next generation, and her belief that there would be young women to take on her life's work. I considered why girls my age didn't identify with feminism. That spring I started my website, BarbarasAngels.com, with the goal of building a community of girls interested in feminism, leadership, and politics.

During a TV interview for She's Out There! I mentioned the site; afterward, I received emails from all over the country. I had an additional opportunity to meet like-minded girls when I participated in a summer retreat in Washington, D.C., called Running Start. An extension of WUFPAC -- Women Under Forty Political Action Committee -- Running Start allows 50 girls with aspirations to run for office to meet women who work on Capitol Hill, in advocacy, as fundraisers, and as campaign managers. I was inspired to learn how many girls applied for the program. Apparently there are 30,000 high school girls who want to run for office!

Finally, through the amazing experience of She's Out There!, I have met several of the other essayists. Reading their blogs I feel I know even more of them. While I hope She's Out There! is inspiring to readers, I know it has changed my perspective. Connecting with one another, we young women are now building our own, network, an "Old Girls Network." At nearly 16, I finally have an optimistic outlook on the future of our country and the role my generation will play.

Read more of the girls' posts.

Go to my blog on HuffPost.

July, 2009

Women are Waiting Rather than Asking

I recently came across this article by Linda Babcock from 2008 called, "Women, Repeat This: Don't Ask, Don't Get." The article deals with the issues of Babcock's new book Women Don't Ask. Babcock noticed her own life and by watching the careers of women around her, that women often were promoted after men, simply because they didn't ask for it, like the men often did. Her solution? Women need to start asking for things.

After reading the article, I started to think about when I've experienced this in my own life. I realized Linda is completely right, I've gotten some amazing opportinities through simply asking for them. When I was fourteen, I went to the Democratic Convention in Denver, Colorado and managed to get out onto the floor. I stood outside the Pepsi Center, where the DNC was being held, and asked every single person who walked out if they had an extra pass they could give me. I realized the worst anyone can say when you ask for something is "no." That was when I conquered my fear of asking. Thinking back on it now, I am only just realizing I had a fear of asking.

Another question Babcock's book brings up is why women have this fear and men do not. What about the different ways we are brought up conditions girls to be afraid to ask. This extends further, I think, than simply asking for things we want, but also the way we interact in the classroom. I mentioned in my last post, Where the Boys' Club Begins, that something makes boys call out in the classroom more than girls, and feel more comfortable asking questions. This probably ties into what makes men ask for promotions while women simply wait to be promoted.

When I was in sixth grade, I did a research paper on women in politics. I visited the capitol and had the chance to interview Nancy Pelosi's chief of staff. She provided me with the records from the Library of Congress of every woman ever to serve as a Senator or Congresswoman, how long they served for, and how they came to office. That was the most interesting part to me. Over sixty percent of the women were appointed to office by a male colleague or family member, before they actually ran. Just like with promotions, it seems they were waiting to be asked.

It turns out I'm not the only person who's noticed this trend. An organization called the Womens Campaign Forum has a program called She Should Runwhich uses the fact that, as they say, "Many women won't think to run for office unless they are asked," to actually encourage women to run! They ask people to submit names of women who they feel should run for office, and then get in touch with them. At one of their events, they passed around a sheet where they told everyone in the audience to write the name of a woman he or she felt should run for office. They believe after these women find out they have encouragement, they will take the first step towards thinking more seriously about running for office. This article on Women's ENews talks more about the program.

June, 2009

Where The Boys Club Begins

Urban Dictionary defines it as, “a term for a club that only allows men into their group, often used as a way to get away from their wives/girlfriends and hang out with other like-minded individuals.” Sometimes prefaced with the word “old,” it has been mentioned by many hot-shot female CEO’s and Nixon and Kennedy Senators who, after penetrating the club, revealed it to the public. I’m talking about The Boys’ Club, and in the fall of my freshman year, I discovered where it begins.

When I think Old Boy’s Club, I think plaid sports jackets, cigars, golf, and some of my friends’ middle-aged fathers. I don’t think two hundred geeky fifteen- through eighteen-year-olds in too-big suits caucusing about Universal Healthcare. In other words, the Debate Team.

After my experiences in debate, I’ve come to realize that these kids are going to be our generation’s Old Boys' Club. It’s going to be a different club from the ones our mothers and grandmothers knew. It will be more racially diverse, and access, I believe, will be more based on merit, rather than old wealth and family connections. However, the gender and power dynamics will probably remain the same.

There’s Model UN, Mock Trial, Mock Congress, and the like, but nothing compares to the men of the Northeast Debate Teams. Competitive, arrogant, witty, cut-throat, snobbish, and ridiculously geeky, they rule the underworld of argument. I first attended debate along with nearly my entire grade when I went to the “interest meeting” in September of 9th grade. Many of my friends, girls and boys, were there, but when we began a practice debate, I found that I was one of the few girls participating. As the debate season wore on, I watched as more and more of my girl friends dropped out. They all had different excuses: that it was too much work or that they just weren’t that interested in the topics. I didn’t fully realize the gender gap until attending my first debate tournament. This is in part because my debate team has more girls than many any others I have come into contact with. At my first debate tournament, however, I debated eight times, debating a girl only once.

What is it about debate that just turns girls away? Debate is filled with stress, competition, intense confrontation, and once in a while failure. These are things I think high school girls are not particularly comfortable dealing with.

Presidential Debate 2008 The type of debate I do is one on one: you, your opponent and a judge. It lasts forty minutes and you give one pre-written speech, and two speeches on the spot. It requires you to think on your feet, remain calm, and deal with intimidation. Why is it boys are more comfortable with this? Is it the same reason that makes them call out in class, and be less afraid to ask questions? Debate uses all the skills girls my age are not used to having. What I didn’t realize before I did debate, was how important many of these skills are. There is one section of the debate called Cross-X, where your opponent questions you for three minutes straight. Sometimes my opponents cut me off in the middle of my answers. Sometimes, they are cold and calculating and try to get me to admit I’m wrong. Mostly, they try to intimidate, scare, and freak me out. After surviving hundreds of Cross-Examinations, I have learned to be cool, collected, and never thrown off. This has become a great advantage in not just debate, but the rest of my life! When I appeared on the National News this past spring to discuss an essay I had in the book She’s Out There!, I didn’t feel nervous at all. I knew any question they threw at me I would be able to handle, because nothing is as scary as a competitive teenage boy with everything riding on his one question. I now know I will be able to survive any college or job interview I ever have, because I have crafted so many answers to so many questions I wasn’t anticipating. This is a skill more girls need to learn, as they move forward as leaders in the political and business arenas.

As much as I want more girls to join Debate Teams, and as important as I know it can be, a little part of me is happy with my Boys’ Club. One of the most important lessons I’ve learned from my experience with debate came not from the Cross-Examinations or the impromptu speeches, but from being one of the only female serious debaters in my division. Boys who didn’t want to respect, talk, or be fair to me were forced to admit I was within their inner circle of competitors, and now approach me with—if still not consideration—some strange form of admiration. I gained a reputation, not as the girl, but as the challenger, and I learned how to brave the scariest of situations. I learned to lose, to be embarrassed, to debate boys a foot taller than me with full beards and boys with huge groups of friends who followed them in to watch the debate, murmuring intimidating things as they passed me. I’ve made enemies, I’ve made great friends, and I’ve learned what it feels like to be victorious and take full responsibility for that. I’ve been competitive, arrogant, witty, cut-throat, snobbish, and ridiculously geeky. Most importantly, I’ve learned to break into the Boys’ Club, and now I’ll never forget how.

You can also find this blog posted at Woosh!, the Girls Leadership Institute Blog.

May, 2009

Supreme Court Appointment: Race and Gender Still an Issue?

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg is lonely. In a New York Times article, the Supreme court justice was asked what it’s like to be the only woman on the court. “Lonely,” she replied.

Although the presidential election is behind us, the issues of race and gender are not. Justice David H. Souter is retiring, and President Obama must appoint a Supreme Court justice to replace him. So far, many names have been thrown around: Solicitor General Elena Kagan Chicago Appeals Court Judge Diane Wood, Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick, and New York Appeals Court Judge Sonia Sotomayer being some of the choices. There is talk that Obama must appoint a woman or racial minority to a court dominated by white men, which may explain why so many of the possible justices are female and racial minorities.

President Obama’s decision will be under scrutiny no matter whom he picks. As a newcomer to The White House, he is proving himself through this decision. The question that arises is whether the emphasis on gender and race is legitimate, or if our focus should be elsewhere. Would all these candidates for supreme court justice be considered for the if they were not female or a racial minority? I don’t know. Even though most of the candidates are qualified, one wonders if every one of the people on this list would be considered if not for their race or gender. While I agree that women and minorities are underrepresented in the court, I don’t think simply appointing a woman or racial minority is the way to fix this. Racial and gender discrimination is not being practiced in the selection of Supreme Court Justices, but rather at lower levels. The absence of women and minorities in the supreme court is due to the lack of women and racial minorities in positions leading up to supreme court justice. This deficiency can’t be fixed by simply appointing women and minorities to the court. Rather, we should concentrate our efforts on making sure gender and race discrimination is not happening at lower levels, and that women and minorities are offered the same opportunities from the very start.

I look forward to seeing a Supreme Court one day that fully represents the population of our country in both gender and race. However, I hope this will happen naturally, leaving us with both a qualified and diverse group of people. By starting at the bottom, we can make sure women and minorities in every field don’t feel lonely.

April, 2009

What is Going on With The New York Times Topics Page on Feminism?

The New York Times

For those of you who weren't aware, The New York Times has "Topics Pages" on nearly everything from olives to crossword puzzles to Rome. The page includes all the articles written on that topic. Lately, I've been frequenting the Feminism page. Most of the articles on the page pertain directly to feminism. In fact, almost all of them include the word "feminism" or "feminist" in the article description or title. Some examples are obituaries of feminists, biographies of feminists, feminist art shows, etc. While I think it is great that such a page exists, I think there are many articles that should be on that page that aren't. For example, when Afghanistan passed a law legalizing rape and Afghan women took to the street protesting, feminists everywhere applauded them. So why is that article missing from the page? When President Obama created The White House Council on Women and Girls, none of the articles about it appeared on the New York Times Topics Page on Feminism.

Is The Times afraid to call something feminist, or are they simply confused? Why is feminism being defined so narrowly? I think I'll email nytimes, but in the meantime, what do you think?

Email your thoughts to barbarasangels@gmail.com

March, 2009

This is Called Abuse, Ladies

A New York Times article this Wednesday uncovered a disgusting reaction to the violent incident involving Chris Brown and Rihanna. Apparently, many young girls and teens aren not only hesitating to stand up for Rihanna, they are encouraging, rooting, and defending Chris Brown! For those of you unfamiliar with the incident, Chris Brown has been charged with beating Rihanna, who he was in a relationship with. You might think teenage girls are simply unaware of the violence that took place, or hesitant to believe Rihanna, but that is not the case. The article interviews several girls who said Rihanna "probably made him mad to react like that." All the girls agreed Chris Brown should go unpunished. Rihanna beat up

With this surprising reaction from my generation, I have to question the way these girls would react had they been in the situation. What Chris Brown did is domestic violence, ladies. Domestic violence does not go unpunished. What on earth made these girls defend C.B.? Also, what kind of an example is Rihanna showing by forgiving and forgetting?

Email your thoughts to barbarasangels@gmail.com.

This article discusses the incident:

Teenage Girls Stand By Their Man, The New York Times

February, 2009

Updated in September, 2009

The Nail Polish Club

When I was in preschool, the girls in my class created a nail polish club. Admission to the club relied on one crucial characteristic: you had to be wearing nail polish. This one rule made the club pretty exclusive, since not that many three and four year olds are nail salon frequenters, but somehow I have a feeling that was the purpose of the club. That, and it was a chance to show off your pink nail polish, if you were one of the few girls allowed to wear that sort of thing. Over the years, the nail polish club slowly fell to decay, but many more sprang up in its place: clubs, groups, and cliques created for the sole purposes of excluding girls based on their style and clothing choices.

It is no secret that our society places tons of emphasis on appearance. Furthermore, I believe it has become increasingly clear that a double standard exists in the ways we scrutinize women’s appearance and dress, in contrast to the way we hardly pay any attention to what men wear. It would be fine with me if as many articles were written about John McCain’s tie choice as there are about Michelle Obama’s inaugural shoes, stockings, hat, or shorts on Air Force One. For years, the first lady of the United States has served as a style icon; someone to aspire to, someone to make fun of, or someone simply to talk about…in excruciating detail. But maybe this can all be chalked up to the mere fact that the first lady has no real job, and anyone accompanying the president so much would be subject to scrutiny. This is where the real dilemma arises. If the appearances spouses of powerful men exhibit is this important, than the same must be true of the spouses of powerful women. I don’t think I have to tell you this is not the case.
The 2008 presidential election is probably the best example of this that exists. Instead of the spouses of powerful women being scrutinized, the powerful women themselves are scrutinized. Remember Hillary Clinton’s “cleavage incident?” (If it can even be called cleavage, or an incident!) The senator was seen wearing a normal, modest V-Neck shirt, showing the tiniest bit of her chest so that a small fraction of a shadow was visible, and the media was incapable of reporting anything else for the next three days. It didn’t stop there, though. Any person who searches Hillary Clinton on Google will probably come up with hundreds of horrendous pictures of the woman along with thousands of critiques of her “fat ankles”, “wrinkled face”, or who knows what else. Now, I doubt Hillary Clinton is the only person alive to ever take a poor photograph, so why is the internet plastered with bad pictures of her and not Barack Obama or Joe Biden? The answer is simple: our perceptions of women in power rely far too heavily on their appearances. Congresswoman Maloney’s Legislative Director told me once that people often call up the office saying, “I didn’t really like the way Congresswoman Maloney had her hair today.” The problem with women in power being scrutinized about their appearances is that that type of scrutiny doesn’t leave much room for thoughts about anything else. I think it’s easy to see that with people thinking this way, it’s no coincidence there aren’t more women in power.

Unlike in preschool, however, it’s not just the girls excluding the girls. Hillary constantly talked about “The Old Boys Club,” during her campaign. There are constantly male bloggers, pundits, and even other politicians remarking about women in power’s appearances. Remember when Biden told Kucinich the only thing he liked about him was his wife? I’m waiting for the day when a female politician is allowed to tell Edwards all she likes about him is his eyes. I’m waiting for the day when someone finally points out: yeah, Hillary’s hair isn’t amazing, but at least she has some! I’m waiting for the day when it doesn’t matter if you have fat ankles, because they don’t have much to do with foreign policy decisions, anyway.

The hardest part of realizing that this double standard exists, however, is realizing that I inevitably subscribe to it. When I see a female politician standing next to a male politician, I inevitably look more closely at her attire and appearance than I do at his. This isn’t all my fault; after all, male politicians wear the same black and white uniform, whereas female politicians switch it up a bit more. Still, I can’t help but feel a tad hypocritical as I reprimand our society’s fixation on a woman’s exterior, yet still enjoy leafing through Vogue every once and a while to examine the overly chic pictures of stick thin women in ridiculous outfits.
Last, this fixation on appearance translates into not only fashion but our fixation on body fat, muscle, and the general make up of the way we were built. In Art History one day, when examining Artemisia Gentileschi’s work, Susannah and the Elders, which portrays a naked woman bathing, a boy in my class raised his hand with the earnest comment, “Why is she so fat?” It is moments like that when it hits me how silly this fixation is. In her day, Susannah was considered quite the hottie I’m sure—two men peep in on her as she baths, after all—but then again, one only has to look at the transition between Marilyn Monroe to Twiggy to Giselle to see how fragile our perceptions of the body are, changing with the frequency of ipods: there’s always something new we have to acquire.
Is it pure coincidence that the wardrobe of female political candidates is often what is discussed the most about them, and that teenage girls suffer far more than boys from body image issues and eating disorders? Probably not, but this brings me to my original question. What am I—what are we—going to do about it?

The delicate line I try to walk between not critiquing other women’s appearances more than their male colleagues, and still sometimes subscribing to the “stupid” fashion trends around me sometimes feels like I am tip-toeing along an imaginary tightrope, from which I might slip at any moment. How can I pretend, when my peers pore over Seventeen, that I too was not conditioned to some extent to critique the cheekbones of the model on the cover? As a fifteen-year-old girl, I am used to appearance being much of what my peers focus on. No matter how much I try to stay out of that mindset, it is all around me right now: in the looks my peers give me as I walk into school in a new outfit, in the various methods of advertising which dictate a very specific way I should look, and in the way I automatically judge a person based on their dress. I can try to think differently, but it will always be difficult to walk that delicate line. For now, my objective is wearing the nail polish, but refraining from joining the club.

You can also find this blog posted at Woosh!, the Girls Leadership Institute Blog.

January, 2009

Early Angels: Women of Crete

Today, I was looking through some old school work, and I came across my 7th Grade term paper. The paper discusses women's roles in Ancient Minoan Society. Take a look:

Minoan Goddess

Minoan Women: Gender Roles in Ancient Crete (May, 2007)

Because Minoan women had large roles in government, society, and religion, Minoan society's value of women was much of the reason the Minoan civilization thrived. Women had a strong hold on Minoan government. In society, they were usually equal to men. In religion, women had a much larger part than men. These factors, along with others, show that Minoan society valued the female.

Women often played a large role in government. Minoan government had both Kings and Queens, who often had equal power. Sometimes the king's daughter even had power, for example, in the myth of Kjng Minos. In this myth, King Minos's daughter affects a big change in the kingdom; she stops the King from feeding innocent people to a bull-like creature called the Minotaur. The main ruler, King or Queen, often also had a large body of officials, which consisted of both men and women. These officials were usually related to the ruler in some way, but sometimes they were just people who specialized in a specific trade, and could be of use to the King. they were very important and often had their own smaller palaces. Women had a lot of influence on Minoan government, and made many important decisions.

Minoan society was divided into classes, based on occupation and wealth; both genders were treated equally. Women had many of the same jobs as men, and often had very powerful occupations. The two jobs at the top of the class system were occupied by both men and women. They were Priests and Priestesses and Kings and Queens. Minoan society was also Matrilineal, meaning that the ancestors where traced through the mother's family, rather the father's. Women were a big part of Minoan culture in many areas. Frescos have been found depicting "bull jumping" as a sport. In the frescos there were both men and women playing together. This is very unique, considering that later-day Greece, not only were women not allowed to play sports with men, they were seldom allowed to play at all. Women also show up in Minoan myths. For example, in the myth of the evil King Minos, Ariadne, King Minos' daughter, is the heroine, and saves many innocent people from a horrible death. This myth may actually have some truth to it, which shows how much women were a part of Minoan society and culture.

In Minoan religion, women were involved as both goddesses and Priestesses. Priestesses had it lot of power in society, and even made decisions in government, in addition to performing many sacred religious rituals. In fact, there were more Priestesses than Priests. Minoans were polytheistic, so they worshipped many gods and goddesses. However, they worshipped the goddess of fertility above all others. At the time of the Minoans, a woman's power to give birth may have still been thought of as a mysterious gift. This would have placed women higher in society and explain why the fertility goddess was a goddess, rather than a god. The snake goddess was also worshipped above many other gods and goddesses. She could shed her skin, which represented re-birth and reproduction. Artemis, Greek goddess of the moon and hunting, originated in Minoan religion.

The Minoan matriarchal religion was unusual for its time and was soon changed. However, many things stayed almost the same. For example, the Minoan goddess "Potnia" was turned into the male god "Poseidon" in later-day patriarchal Greek religion. The Minoan goddess "Diktynna" or "Britomartic'" was turned into "Dionysus" or "Bacchus" in Greek and Roman patriarchal religion. These are interesting changes to note, because they show the extreme shift in power after the Minoan era. They also clearly show how unique Minoan society was, and how much power women had in Minoan religion.

Gender roles were not an issue in Minoan society. Women were placed equally to men in government, culture, and religion. In some areas, women were even more powerful than men. This may seem strange for modem-day standards, but in a way, what makes it any stranger than men being placed above women? In many societies today, men have a more important role in society than women. The Minoan's style of living is very interesting and is one we should look at for ideas. Perhaps, by finding a balance between their way of life and ours, we can create a perfect society. Gender equality was much of the reason Minoan society thrived.

December, 2008

Election Night Uptown and Downtown

At 9:00 PM on election night, I walked up the stairs of the Sheraton Hotel on 51st Street and 7th Avenue, and into the main entrance. Signs directed me into the Grand Ballroom, where I signed in and took the paper bracelet that served as admission. Walking through the doors to the grand ballroom, I saw television crews, giant screens broadcasting CNN and MSNBC, and New York Democrats from the City Council, Congress, and other elected offices. Most of the people in the room had some affiliation to the press or an elected official. Surprisingly, the mood was relaxed. This was the official celebration for New York Democrats, usually held every two years at the Sheraton Hotel. Many politicians had rented out suites on the floors above, but would come down when Obama’s win was announced. For now, however, the Grand Ballroom was filled, but not packed, with people waiting for the announcement.

People stood with their drinks, making conversation and staring up at the large screens. As Obama won more states I heard the people around me comment, “That’s it, Obama’s won. “ Every time the screen showed him as the projected winner for a state, the group gave a cheer, and some toasted each other. A stage was set up across the room, where speakers would appear later that night. For now, however, it stayed empty.
At around ten, I made my way out of the ballroom, realizing that it would be a while until any sort of real celebration started. Disappointed, I decided to 125th Street head home, uptown to Harlem.

At 11:00, I walked into my room to start any unfinished homework, when I heard a sudden roar come from the street outside. I figured it would die down, but then I heard it grow. A trumpet played, and I realized what was happening.

Outside, the side street in front of my house was quiet, like it always is. 125 and Lenox However, on this particular night, not a sound was heard from any of the houses, and the entire block seemed abandoned. When I turned onto Lenox Avenue, I realized why. Everyone on the avenue seemed to be walking in one direction: uptown. Some were carrying posters, some ran, and some, like me, walked briskly forward, cameras in hand. Our destination was clear. 125th Street and Lenox is not only the crossroads of Harlem, it is a major intersection, where the streets also known as “Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd.” and “Malcolm X Blvd.” meet. At this point, the roads had not yet been blocked off, and cars whizzed by with open windows, people leaning out of them and shouting. Several cars had stopped in the middle of the street, and people sat on them, yelling and waving banners and flags. Lenox Avenue is usually bustling with people shopping, and even people selling from tables or the ground. Tonight, it seemed like all the merchandise being sold had OBAMA written on it somewhere.

Harlem residents celebrate
The crowd was headed toward the large courtyard of the Adam Clayton Powell Jr. New York State Office Building on 125th Street. Above us, a screen showed the stage where Obama would be giving his acceptance speech. The people gathered around the courtyard all had different reactions. Most were giddy with excitement, yelling and cheering. An African-American woman next to me, who looked to be in her seventies, had tears running down her face. When I caught her eye, she looked at me and said, “We did it. The whole world is watching.” It was true. Moments before, a white van had been circling the block, the sun roof open, and a man—who we later learned was French —reached out of it holding an American flag. “Obama!” he yelled, and was met by cheers from the crowd.

The screen above us changed, and began showing what was presently happening in the courtyard. Governor David Paterson stood at a podium and spoke into the microphone. He was followed by former Mayor David Dinkins, who was met by loud cheers from the crowd when he started his speech with, “Hello Harlem!” The crowd yelled, laughed, and cried. The woman next to me turned to two children nearby and told them they were witnessing history. At one point, a New Orleans jazz band complete with trumpets, drums, and other instruments danced through the crowd playing and singing, “Oh When Obama Comes Marching In”. The crowd joined in, and formed a circle around the band, dancing and clapping. The French man in the white van made another round around the block.

Harlem resident celebrates
When I turned to make my way home, the crowd had doubled, at least, in size. Police had arrived, and barricades had been put up to block off the streets, which were filled with people. The celebration went on late into the night, and when I woke up the next morning, I still heard shouts of happiness and excitement. The real celebration was not downtown at the Sheraton Hotel, but at the crossroads of Harlem, and I don’t see it stopping soon.

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